Poet of the Day – Penelope Schott

National Poetry Month April 17, 2020

Penelope Schott

 Dear Repair Technician,
My husband is not operating properly.
When he drives, he doesn’t speak,
or if he does, he says, that’s a Tesla.
In bed when I want my feet rubbed,
his hands will drift up to my breasts.
If he slices strawberries for cereal,
the stems remain in the kitchen sink.
Also he watches too much television.
He has not malfunctioned politically
for which I am grateful, and affection
is still reliable. Call with an estimate.
If marriage came with a warranty,
I believe it has long since expired.
Any minor improvement in function
will be appreciated as I do not plan
on replacing him.   Sincerely yours,
Dear Repair Technician” appeared in my book HOUSE OF THE CARDAMOM SEED.

1.     What inspired you to write this poem?

  Living with this guy for 35 years! Plus his new Tesla.

2.     What do you like about this poem?

I like that it’s funny as well as true.

3.     What would you change about this poem?

I don’t know whether what I would change is about the poem or my husband. I wish he could believe that it’s a love poem.

4.     Where, when, and how often do you write?

I write as I walk the dog, which is daily, and then I come home and write down what I’ve been repeating in my mind.

5.     What poetry books are you reading right now?

I’m reading Christopher Buckley and Elizabeth Woody and everything else in the precarious stack by the bed.